The Leather Bandit
by Dr4g0n Sl4yrrrrr
Summary: A spinoff of my previous work, The Great Swan Heist (either can be read without the other)-just what did Bisca do to get Alzack to confess to her? Click for fairy love! Click for teh adorbs! Click for entirely TOO much Western slanguage! Rated T for mild physical interaction (there had to be SOME, this is a confession story! We know how it ends!)


**A/N: This is something of a spinoff of my first Fairy Tail story, The Great Swan Heist. In that story, I mysteriously allude to something of questionable legality that Bisca does in order to get Alzack to confess. I still have not seen all of FT, so I do not know if this is actually addressed at some point in the canon—if so, just ignore it ;) I also do not know if Alzack was aware of her history prior to joining FT—in this story, he is not!**

**SPOILER ALERT: Takes place after events on Tenrou Island!**

**Disclaimer: No, mom, I don't **_**own**_** Fairy Tail. I just obsess over it. Geez.**

The remaining members of Fairy Tail would never forget those comrades that had fallen at Tenrou Island. It had been nearly a year since they'd received word, and their fourth Master had taken his place. With old master Makarov and arguably all of Fairy Tail's strongest members gone, things in Magnolia had taken a turn for the worst. Times were tough for the once-renowned guild. A lot of folks held grudges—a lot more tasted greed and sought the opportunity to become the next great guild.

As a result, the less-scrupulous members of Fairy Tail had taken it upon themselves to do what they could. A veteran rogue, Bisca Mulan knew when it was time to take matters into her own hands—even if it meant leaving Alzack in the dark.

The once-glorious guild hall had already begun to fall into disrepair. Even another slipshod assault like the one they had faced the week before, and Master Macao would have to seriously consider relocation. Bisca sat in the corner of the dilapidated hall early one morning, polishing the barrel of her gun. Alzack hadn't appeared yet, and conversation was light at the bar. It was not uncommon to hear small groups of members holding hushed discussions about leaving Fairy Tail to seek their fortune and livelihood elsewhere. If she was being fair, Bisca supposed she could understand. Requests were few and far between these days. You had to take care of your own bacon. That kind of thinking just didn't sit right with the sharp-shooter, though. The guild had always done right by her, even though she hadn't exactly done the same for it at the start of things. At the very least, Bisca reckoned, she ought to keep an eye on things for Erza's sake. It had been Erza that brought her into the guild in the first place, and Bisca knew that things had fallen far below the exacting woman's standards.

As she pondered what she might do, and the very real possibility of employing her old skills as an unlawful woman, a thought niggled at the back of her mind. Alzack. She was not the same _girl_ she'd been back then—was that a side of her that she wanted him to see? For all her confidence, he just seemed to chase it all away when he came near. What would he think of her, if he saw her in her heyday? _I'm doing it for Fairy Tail_, she thought to herself. He hadn't confessed to her yet, nor she to him, and she couldn't make heads or tails of it. She knew he was just as sweet on her as she was on him. But if she picked up an old trail, would he still want to follow?

In the end, it boiled down to one simple solution: Bisca had to act in disguise.

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"Put'cher hands in the air! This here is a stickup!" A figure in a long leather coat and tall, spurred boots fixed a pistol on the seedy-looking trio that was presently attempting to vandalize Fairy Tail's iconic sign. The bold coots hadn't even waited 'til the sun was properly down. At the loud, accented cry, a head poked out a window in the large building. With nothing else to do, and sitting around at home being too miserable, people still gathered at the guild hall in the evenings. That head was joined by a few others and together they watched as the figure in the coat turned. It was a woman, with long dark hair pulled into a braid down her back. On her head sat a red Stetson, and only her piercing eyes were visible above the black cloth tied around her face. More than a few jaws dropped upon glimpsing what lay _beneath_ the leather coat. The woman's ample bosom was marginally restrained by a scant red leather-fringed top—belly bared to the wind. Although her legs were clad in dark chaps, she wore nothing with them save a matching leather bikini. A holster for two was slung around her hip.

"Git'chur butts down hurr, 'r yer dead meat!" The twang rang heavy through the air as the three men hurried to oblige.

"D-d-d-don't shoot, m-m-ma'am!" One of the men crawled forward on his knees, his hands over his head. The bucket of red paint he'd been carrying had splattered over his torso when he dropped to the ground, making it look as though he had indeed been shot.

"I want ya ta turn around reeeeal nice and slow like, y'hear?" This was punctuated with a sharp gesture of the gun. The three complied. "Now, what d'ya have to say fer yerselves to these nice guild folk?"

"W-w-we're sorry! P-p-please forgive us!" The three bowed in unison as the crowd of Fairy Tail mages looked on. When the kneeling men heard the unexpected sound of a hammer being cocked right behind their heads, they practically yelped. She had moved up behind them and trained the gun at the back of the leader's head.

"If'n I _e'er_ see y'all round these parts ag'in, y'all will be men-a-hangin', 'n trust me," her voice dropped low, "I'm _souuund_ on the goose." With that, the three men turned tail and ran. When the guild burst out in cheers, congratulating and thanking the "Leather Bandit", she too disappeared. Among those watching her leave was Alzack, a look of awe on his face.

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Back in her room at Fairy Hills, Bisca reflected on her evening. All things washed and dried, it had gone rather well. She had to laugh a little at herself; she hadn't imagined that she'd _ever_ be speaking like that again in her life. The all-leather ensemble was a little more than she usually took to, but she wasn't supposed to be herself here anyway. That was the whole point of the getup. She stashed it, wig and all, in the back of her wardrobe before hurrying back to Fairy Tail to see the aftermath.

Her efforts seemed well worth it. Moments of jubilation were rare these days, but tonight the drink flowed freely and the crowd was loud.

"Did you see that coat?" Little Romeo didn't smile anymore, but that didn't mean he wasn't impressed by the masked woman.

"Coat! Ha! How about that _rack!_ Heh heh," Wakaba puffed excitedly on his cigar. The boy's cheeks colored, and Macao half-heartedly chastised his longtime friend.

"Don't go saying things like that to my kid!"

Bisca too had blushed slightly at the comment, but she merely averted her eyes and sought out Alzack. He was seated at the bar, where Kinana and Laki were debating with Max about what kind of pistol the Leather Bandit had been holding.

"Bisca!" Al waved her over when he saw her. She smiled, and her heart fluttered lightly in her chest as she slid onto a stool next to him.

"So how about that bandit?" Bisca prompted casually. Al blushed slightly and he mumbled something she couldn't hear. "Sorry, Al, didn't catch that," she smiled apologetically.

"S-she's cool," he breathed, a faraway look in his eyes. He looked up at Bisca. "You know, she kind of reminds me of you. Silly, right?" He laughed at himself.

Bisca sat back, her cheeks pinking again. Had Alzack maybe _liked_ the bandit act?

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It wasn't long before Bisca got the opportunity to test her theory. A few days later, Romeo returned to the guild even more dispirited than he usually was. A little prompting, and she and Alzack discovered that some neighborhood boys had been picking on him, and insulting the guild. It was not unlike what had happened around the time that Lucy Heartfilia joined Fairy Tail—Macao had taken a dangerous job at Romeo's request, to spite the boys who had then called the guild weak. _Somebody ought to teach those boys a lesson!_ Bisca thought to herself angrily—but she knew she couldn't go after little boys.

It was sheer luck that when Alzack took Romeo out to play in the park, the other boys were there too. Bisca had initially declined the invitation to join the two Fairy Tail mages, but changed her mind after they left. When she spied them in the park, Romeo was pointing two of the boys out to Alzack. They were a lot older than Bisca had expected—old enough to know better.

Since taking on her role as the mysterious watchman of the guild, Bisca realized the impracticality of her costume. It was no use to her in the back of her closet at Fairy Hills, but it was too bulky to carry in an inconspicuous knapsack. She had spent the past few days learning how to requip not only her weapons, but also her clothes. She was still a far cry from Titania Erza, but in a situation like this, she had plenty of time. Ducking behind a tree, she donned the mask and leather.

She approached the scene from the side, pistol trained on the not-so-little boys. They too had noticed Romeo and had approached him, unawares of the woman on their left until she spoke.

"Now don't go doin' do somethin' ya might regrit in th' mornin'!" The boys stopped and looked at her, stupid grins of pleasure spreading across their faces. Yes, they were certainly old enough to enjoy the red leather.

"Well look what we have here," one drawled, as he began to strut over toward her. This didn't faze Bisca, she'd had plenty of big talkers under her gun before. A careful but quick shot over his left shoulder stopped him in his tracks. He must have been looking for trouble though, because he managed to school his features to hide his surprise and momentary fear before looking at his shoulder and barking out a laugh. "Ya missed, lady. But that's okay, I'll still take real good care of you."

Bisca lowered her gun and put her hand on her hip, tilting it up and towards the boy in a provocative way. He resumed his advance, and she let him get just near enough… to wipe the smirk off his face with a swift roundhouse kick to the head. As she stood straddling his body with the gun once again pointed at him, she noticed the other boy trying to sneak up on her.

"Uh-uh-uh!" She moved her aim lower, between the prone boy's legs. He yelped and covered himself with his hands. "One more step 'n I'll blow 'is bits to bits!" The other boy paused, glancing around for help. Romeo and Alzack only looked on in anticipation, waiting to see how the bandit would handle things. "Y'all better start singin' a new tune, 'n say somethin' nice to those pretty gentlemen over there, 'r else y'all be singin' a might higher!" She clicked the safety on another pistol, which she had pointed around her back at the second boy.

They didn't have much choice. Choruses of "we're sorry!" rang out as the two sweaty boys shot off like greased lightning. Bisca laughed to herself as she holstered her pistols and turned to leave.

"W-wait!" Alzack called out. She looked back at him and saw the hesitation and reverence in his expression. His hand was stretched toward her but when she met his eyes, his face turned red.

"Yeah?" She called back, the twang still in her voice. She took a step toward him, spinning her spurs as she did so.

"Uhm, that is…" he looked down, twisting his fingers together. With his eyes averted he seemed to recover some of his previous determination, and he looked back up, blurting out a thanks.

Bisca's smirk was hidden by her black bandana, but her eyes still showed the amusement. She sauntered up to Alzack and struck a pose similar to the suggestive one she'd held for the first boy. She ran a finger down his poncho. "Well I might not mind havin' _you_ to take care of me," she said slowly and deliberately. The man seemed to swoon on his feet a little before stepping back quickly to run away. Romeo blinked up at her.

"Nice coat, Bisca."

She froze, looking down at the younger boy. "Y-you got the wrong pig by the tail there, boy," she stammered, barely maintaining the drawl.

"Don't worry, I'll keep your secret. You're the coolest, and you make Al all funny, even if you are kinda gross," he said in a casual voice. "Well, gotta go."

She watched him leave, a mixture of apprehension and giddiness swirling in her chest. Then she realized what she'd said to Alzack. Where did _that_ confidence come from?

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As Bisca continued her charade over the next few weeks, she found her Leather Bandit-self flirting more and more with Alzack. There was just something cute about how he got all worked up when she sidled up to him and batted those eyelashes. When she wasn't in costume, he seemed somewhat strained. He was just as nervous around the green haired woman as he had always been, but now his mannerisms were tinged with a hint of guilt. Bisca may be a shy pony around him, but she was no chucklehead. She knew his feelings were getting all mixed up, and when she realized how her behavior might be unfair to her longtime companion, she began to feel a little guilty herself. But what could she do? Clearly he did appreciate this side of her. Perhaps he wouldn't mind a little visit from the bandit herself, after-hours.

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The sun was low in the sky as Alzack made his way home. It had been a quiet day, but he felt much too troubled to enjoy himself at the guild hall with his friends that evening. He didn't know what he was feeling anymore. _Stupid bandit_, he thought to himself. _Being around Bisca used to feel good!_ All he could feel now was confusion. He'd always harbored what he'd _thought_ were strong feelings for Bisca, and even though he hadn't yet managed to pluck up the courage to confess to her, well that didn't mean he wasn't going to _someday_… But then that masked woman showed up and kept _coming on_ to him. He'd never known what to do with that kind of behavior to begin with. And the fact that every time she did, he couldn't help but think of Bisca didn't help. He sighed in frustration and kicked a pebble as he strode down the secluded path to his cottage. He almost made it past the lone figure leaning against a nearby tree without noticing her, but the corner of his eye caught the movement she made as she straightened up. He turned to look, and stopped moving entirely when he realized who it was.

"Y-you!" His expression was almost terrified as he staggered backward, but it wasn't for fear of the woman herself—it was for what she did to him. "You know, you've really caused me a lot of trouble!"

"Is that right?" she drawled lazily. Her steps were those of a predator whose prey has sensed imminent danger. Her quarry backed away further.

"S-stay back." Although his words were broken, his conviction was evident.

"Now, you don't _reeeally_ want that, do you?" The bandit's words were still accented, but less so now. She continued her advance, Alzack backing up until he could go no farther—he'd hit the treeline. His back pressed up against the bark of a wide trunk.

"I have no interest in you!" Alzack protested as she moved even closer. Although she was not yet touching him, he could feel her presence along every inch of his body.

"You don't like cowgirls? Or is it Westerners in general?" Despite her questions, the bandit held her ground.

"T-that's not it," he said turning his face away and coloring slightly. "J-just someone…someone else."

Bisca's heart felt light in her chest, and her head swam slightly. "Alzack," she said in her own quiet voice. He looked up at her, confusion in his eyes. The bandit even _sounded _like her. He was about to attempt an escape when his eyes locked once again with hers. His body began to move of its own volition, his hands reaching up toward her face—he _had_ to know. His fingers trembled slightly as they met black cloth, and he tugged it gently downwards. Under the bandana was a pair of bright red lips, lips he had dreamed of for years.

"Bisca?" was all he managed to say, before she closed the gap between them and kissed him. His body was rigid during the seconds it took his mind to process what had happened. When he realized he wasn't dreaming, that it really was Bisca, _his_ Bisca in his arms, he responded eagerly. She still had him pinned against the tree, her hands by his ears, fingers twined in the hair at the back of his neck. Alzack's hands moved to her bare waist as he gripped her closer and deepened the kiss. They parted moments later, breathing heavily as they touched their foreheads together. Their eyes closed, Bisca brushed her nose against Alzack's.

"Bisca." He said again. She opened her eyes, but his were still shut. She could feel the hand creeping up her back pause when it found the dark wig she was still wearing. He opened his eyes and looked up at the red Stetson. With his free hand, he picked it up off her head. The hand behind her back tugged the wig off, letting her long green hair fall about her shoulders. He set the Stetson back on her head.

"That's better," he smiled. "Keep this," he said gesturing to the hat. "And Bisca?"

"Yes?"

He turned them around together so her back was facing the tree, and dropped to one knee.

"Marry me."

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In the end, Macao made the decision to retreat. His concerns were as much to keep the peace as they were for the fact that the guild as a whole didn't have a tail feather left. Repairing the massive guild hall was out of the question. He instructed Bisca and the others to stop retaliating, and encouraged the entire guild to accept that this was now the way of Fairy Tail. They would move the guild to a small farm on the outskirts of Magnolia and regroup quietly. If anybody came fixin' to fight, well they wouldn't find one there.

Upon discovering that she was with child, Bisca had to accede. Although he greatly enjoyed this wilder side of his wife, Alzack privately agreed that it was for the best.

**A/N: That's all, folks! Thanks for reading. R&R! I know I slacked off on the lingo, and I know that it ended up being less illegal than I originally intended. Whoops?**


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